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The College Cynic
The perfect newspaper business model: wrap ‘em over caguamas
Newspaper industry, I have seen the future! On a recent trip to Mexicali, I discovered the business model that the Mexican newspaper industry is surviving on.
I am a very loyal friend. So loyal that I put my fear of Mexicali’s unpaved, and unlit neighborhoods aside to see my friend’s band play at a “house party.” It should be noted that the standards for what constitutes a house in Mexico are NOT the same as they are here, so it was more like a shack-party.
Given my lack of street-smarts, I would not survive more than five minutes alone in Mexicali’s open streets, so I had my friend Pako give me a ride, (readers will remember Pako from the summer scarf blog).
We drove to a very scary place known as “la Baja,” entire shoe stores hung from electrical wires, and if it were anyone else giving me a ride, I would have sworn I had been kidnapped.
We arrived at the party, again, I use that term loosely, (I guess all musicians need to play slightly self-degrading gigs when they’re getting started).
But it was then that I noticed Mexico’s innovative, and proactive business model for newspapers. Partygoers were drinking caguamas, Mexico’s monstrous 31.8 oz bottles of watered-down delight, which I calculate I would finish in the span of about 3 days. Yet the Mexican caguama industry had two problems. One, the large bottle took longer to drink and would thus get warm before it was finished; and two, it is technically illegal to drink in public in Mexico, and a 31.8 oz bottle is not easily concealed.
The solution: newspapers.
In a world and era where newspapers are failing miserably, the Mexican newspaper industry has discovered a profitabl byproduct--caguama wraps
When you buy a caguama in Mexico, the shopkeeper will wrap the bottle in newspaper, which conceals it from public view, and “word on the street” is that wrapping a bottle in newspaper also keeps your hands from warming the beer.
I believe that in the spirit of American entrepreneurship, we need to take this idea and capitalize on it.
Hear me out.
Publications can form alliances with beverage companies to target consumers. Beer can be wrapped in copies of Sports Illustrated, Starbucks coffee with Vogue magazine, and wine bottles with the bible, or the New York Times, (demographics would need to be considered).
It might be a stretch, but compared with other failed newspaper business models, it’s worth a try.
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About the Blogger
It’s Friday night and you want to know where you can find a typical Imperial Valley teenager. Should you look in El Centro’s bowling alley? No. Just follow the herd of overly dressed teens gasping and reaching for the U.S./Mexico border.Thankfully, 18-year-old Luis Flores keeps his Mexicali escapades to a minimum; and instead, observes and is too often entertained by this and similar trends which rarely take place outside the valley.
Luis Flores is a Brawley-born Calexico resident. He graduated from Calexico High School in 2008, when he enrolled at Imperial Valley College. Like a fellow ivnews.INFO blogger, Luis was a Boy Scout at his local Mormon church. Unlike his fellow blogger, Luis is NOT an Eagle Scout, not even close.
Luis considers himself an “artist,” and no, not just because he’s broke and jobless. This fall he will be applying for transfer admission into various universities and plans to study some form of English, and some form of art.
Luis' blog will deal with those interesting things that make the Imperial Valley unique, aside--and outside--from our depressing national standings. Everything from the point of view of a college student who is still trying to get out of the valley.
Previous Posts
The College Cynic: The perfect newspaper business model: wrap ‘em over caguamas
| Mon, 7 Sep 2009 1:35 PMNewspaper industry, I have seen the future! On a recent trip to Mexicali, I discovered the business model that the Mexican newspaper industry is surviving on. (…)
The College Cynic: The College Cynic: I believe I drowned, not choked
| Sat, 8 Aug 2009 9:57 AMIf guided by the correct use of the English language, then what I experienced was choking. But it is because I am a big fan of the proper use of English that I think choking does not accurately define what I experienced.
The College Cynic: A sobering look at Hispanic culture, journalism and myself
| Tue, 14 Jul 2009 6:48 PMI strongly disagree with the assumption that all Mexican-Americans have this melancholic longing to express their culture in whatever they end up doing.
The College Cynic: A non-cynical farewell to Puerto Rico and new friends
| Thu, 9 Jul 2009 6:14 AMSome new friends from the NAHJ convention in Puerto Rico
Not even the anticipation of flying first class could drown down the premature melancholy I felt as I prepared to leave Puerto Rico. It’s neither the horrible humidity nor the glorious finger foods that I will miss the most, it will be the people. (…)The College Cynic: Pre-convention crazies in San Juan, Puerto Rico
| Thu, 25 Jun 2009 11:44 AMNoche de San Juan ritual: I would rather keep the evil spirits in me than risking a concussion after hitting my head against another cursed soul.
The College Cynic: Puerto Rico–reminding myself I am not in Mexicali
| Thu, 25 Jun 2009 11:02 AMGiven that I slept during my flight from Newark to Puerto Rico, when I arrived I thought my airplane had taken a detour to Mexico. Even now, I need to turn to the ocean to remind myself that I’m on a Caribbean island and not Mexicali on a VERY humid day. (…)
The College Cynic: Observing a quinceñera….hmmmmm
| Wed, 17 Jun 2009 1:49 PMThe ritual-like celebration consists of a mass–in which God is thanked for… something– followed by a loose version of a wedding reception, in which the newly God-approved teen hosts an alcohol and sin-filled party.
The College Cynic: Plane paranoia and Daddy Yankee
| Wed, 20 May 2009 5:29 AMAt first, the simple thought of flying in an airplane over the Bermuda Triangle was enough to make me nauseous–too many History Channel alien marathons.
The College Cynic: The Summer Scarf–Cool or Hot?
| Thu, 14 May 2009 7:00 PMUnlike the traditional western bandana, this scarf is much larger, has fringe tips, and is not worn to wipe sweat off one’s forehead.
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thats true luis, see you always come up with innovative ideals to recover this country from the crisis. and about the baja thing, yeah “la baja” is dangerous for everybody who’s not from there.
Steer clear of any dangerous places–in Baja or even in NYC– and you’ll have a nice turista visit. But then, how much fun is that?
Hahaha. I love this…
you promised me it was going to be funny, yet i promised you a comment so here it is
you drunk too much of that caguame…
Very insightful luis:P
Hhhhmmm,…. I am intrigued by the idea of using the bible to wrap your wine bottle in, despite the potential danger. As you stagger across 4th Street you may be spotted and condemned as heretical by someone on their way to bible study group. It might even get you run over, or maybe brought before a “death panel” if our “pinko” president has his way with congress. (Hey, Luis! I enjoyed your blog… I’ll be reading more of them. Thanks for telling me about it.)
Well im glad to hear that you didnt die from drowking, this article has to me my favorite, i especially liked the shack party, and the fact that we could put the bible on wine hahahaha truly funny… cant wait to read your next article
The “New York SomeTimes”? Only you would.
Its funny how beer gives people so many ideas yet still has the ability to f–k you up and forget all the ideas after a couple of them…we need to take more of these trips man!
“clap, clap” that’s all you get.
haha, no, but seriously, this is pretty good. good job man
This blog was very funny… I love your ideas!